The sunshine + the shark

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When the darkness comes
I say “Good evening, wolves”
What would you have me feel?
Can I stay with you long enough to open to life?
Do I have to run
each day at dusk
to the warm embrace of another?
or sweet white wine dripping down my tongue
or to the familiar buzz of the soft movie
or any of the other mindless
ways we drown you out
wait
could I let you howl at your highest
embracing the entirety of the moon
feeling and releasing as it arises
gazing into your yellow eyes
could I say I’m here
I see you
I hear you
I love you
even with all of your darkness
I feel you
you’re allowed to be here
I give you permission to run wild
I give you permission to shine today
bitterness
guilt
resentment
shame
you’re allowed here
because without the feeling of this pain
I couldn’t get the sunrise
I couldn’t see the ecstasy life holds
I couldn’t feel the caverns of my wild heart beating
I couldn’t take this one giant wild breath
and say
I’m alive
I’m alive
I’m alive
for this is my land
and this body encases my home
and in my home
you’re safe
you’re loved
you’re seen and heard
in my home
I’m free
to be me
all of me
not a little part
not only the part that feels good
the entire spectrum
the rainbow
the sunshine
and the shark
and today
I’m the shark
who is no match for the wolves
captive inside me
waiting to be set free